Every woman must define what motherhood looks like and feels like for themselves. Everyone knows the concept that we’re all unique and different; and just as we discovered ourselves through teen-hood and our early twenties. Now as we come into ourselves as mothers we must delve back into the pesky questions of “Who am I?”, “What do I need?”, “What gives me life?” The world needs strong authentic mothers who know themselves, give time to themselves and find balance between mama, family, and work time.
“I honestly felt like I had very few role models as a new mum who had found a peace and rhythm with getting their own creative needs met as they parented a small being. I judged myself for still wanting to create. I felt like I wasn’t a perfect mother because I felt like I was crumbling when I didn’t have time to myself each day. I turned into an empty shell of myself when I gave up who I was entirely because I thought that’s what it was to mother.”-Leonie Dawson
I can completely relate to this, it is utterly impossible for me to lay aside my other passions for my children. I don’t think that’s harsh. The reality is I am not completely satisfied and in nirvanic bliss by solely being a mom. That is who I am. I need time and freedom to dance and hoola hoop, read and journal, sew, create, and garden, work on my business, be involved in my birth community and attend clients. Without theses things I’ve found I become a crabby, high-strung mess. I need these outlets, they make me who I am, they fuel me and delight me, and when I feel vibrant and alive, I am a better mother. When I am fulfilled I can give my best to my children. It’s not selfish. In fact, I believe I’m setting a very positive example of self care, self acceptance and authentic, heart centered living.
What makes you feel like the best mom in the world?
We need to lift each other up and encourage mothers to discover themselves in their new role. Women feel so much guilt, shame and judgment over so many things, how they mother does not need to be on the list!
There is no one way to be a mother, there is only the way you mother, and you will make it work for you and your family.
I love you, you are awesome!
Photo Credit: Kevin Conor Keller via Compfight cc